I was relieved when I found out there was an actual term for secretly rooting for two fictional characters to get-it-together and fall in love. I was even more relieved to find out so many people “shipped” some of the very same pairings I did. Admittedly, I seem to only fall for the couples that bring the most distress to my emotional well-being, because I am clearly a crazy person who loves to wallow in unnecessary grief and tears over people who don’t actually exist.
Whether they are tales of unrequited love, star-crossed lovers, or are just simply so cute it’s nauseating, the following “ships” are sure to at least break your heart— or if you’re crazy like me, will probably destroy your will to live for a few days. Or, if you thought you were over these romantic pairings, I’m here to remind you that you totally aren’t. Starting at #9 and making my way through the couples that have consumed the most of my sanity, here are 9 ships sure to ruin your life.
*Oh, and watch out for SPOILERS.
9. Kate and Sawyer, Lost
In the beginning, it may have seemed impossible that survivors Kate and Sawyer would ever get together. It’s true, even though Sawyer always showered Kate with adoration and affection (though sometimes pervy affection), she wasn’t always overly impressed with him. This might have been because Sawyer was a smooth-talking, southern womanizer with a dark twinkle in his eye, and Kate was a no bullshit, I-can-handle-myself boss-bitch who had no time for his endless supply of one-liners. Much to her own resistance though, even the hard-to-get Kate couldn’t help but eventually be swooned a time or two by Sawyer’s charm. Once she glimpsed the good-hearted man that was underneath his bad-boy exterior, her affections for Sawyer grew, though still complicated, and she was determined to convince Sawyer of his own goodness.
So, where did it go wrong? Even with the number of steamy moments between the two, they didn’t end up together, and needless to say I think the writers got it wrong. Not only do I believe Kate inspired Sawyer to be a better person, but their love/hate, hot/cold relationship felt natural, and their chemistry was undeniable. I didn’t buy the relationship between Kate and Jack. Juliet was quite irksome, and her relationship with Sawyer felt forced. There were many more memorable scenes between Sawyer and Kate, and the way he called her “Freckles” slayed me every time. Even though she did try to deny her feelings, it was obvious Kate loved Sawyer. I mean, c’mon, I never saw Kate kiss Jack the way she kissed Sawyer!
8. Elliot and Angela, Mr. Robot
This is definitely my most newfound ship, but ever since the first episode of Mr. Robot where Elliot introduced us to his childhood bestfriend, called her one of the “good ones”, and then gave hint of jealousy towards her numb-skull boyfriend, I thought “Yep, I ship it!” This will-they/won’t they game between Elliot and Angela has to be leading somewhere, right? I know it’s not in Elliot’s nature to disclose information with the audience that he isn’t ready to share, but he gives himself away in his daydreams. He always pictures Angela by his side—even marrying her in some cases.
There’s a fierce protectiveness between these two, grounded by a terrible loss they both have suffered. It’s no secret Elliot’s got some social issues and doesn’t let people in easily, but I think Angela is the one person who truly holds him down, breathing a sense of calm and normalcy to his life. And I mean, we pretty much wouldn’t have had a show if Elliot hadn’t decided to burn the CEO of Evil Corp just for insulting Angela during that exec meeting. If that’s not love than I don’t know what is. We might only be going into season 3 here with this show, but these two need to quit playing games and get it together already! I mean, just friends? I don’t know who these two think they’re playing.
7. Jesse and Jane, Breaking Bad
Okay, so I am still not over Jane’s death. I know these two hit a rather low point with the whole, you know, doing heroin until the point of overdose, but you can’t deny—when these two were good, they were really good. In a lot of ways, Jane was both the best thing that ever happened to Jesse and the worst— at the same, damn time. She opened his mind and inspired him in so many ways, and brought out the best in him. But sadly, the two of their lifestyles could never be anything but toxic for one another.
As a vulnerable, recovering drug-addict, Jane should never have been around the meth-slingin’ Jesse. He dragged her back into the dark place she had worked so hard to climb out of, and in turn, her influence on Jesse dragged him down even further than he was to begin with. Jesse’s reaction to Jane’s death was one of the hardest to watch. He really did love her, but the truth is, their relationship could never have gone any other way.
6. Jon Snow and Ygritte, Game of Thrones
The first authentic star-crossed lovers on my list, Jon and Ygritte’s relationship was doomed from the start. Ygritte being a savage “wildling” beyond-the-wall and Jon Snow being a Winterfell watcher-on-the-wall, the two were taught all their life to fear and kill each other’s kind. Ygritte’s saucy taunting of Jon Snow’s virginity stirred a sense of curiosity between the captive and the captor. Jon’s sworn celibacy as a member of the Night Watch made the sexual tension unfolding between the two all the more juicier. While it all escalated to a canon relationship (and a steamy cave-scene that won’t be forgotten soon), like most things on Game of Thrones we knew this relationship would be 6 feet under, real quick.
The loyal Jon Snow was still devoted to Ygritte even after her tragic death, denying the red witch’s advances as she says “The dead don’t need lovers,” to which he responds, “I know, but I still love her.” And how could anyone forget, this fictional romance spawned a real-life relationship between actors Kit Harrington and Rose Leslie. At least if we’re broken up about Jon and Ygritte we can find solace in that fact.
5. Violet and Tate, American Horror Story
Violet fell fast for the angsty, troubled Tate, but his blonde hair and adorable dimples weren’t quite enough to overshadow the fact that he was a psychopath killer who, BTW, was also a ghost. Although Tate was deeply disturbed, violent, and dangerous—damn did he love Violet. She was the one person he was really, truly vulnerable and delicate with, and there was something oddly beautiful about that connection. When Tate confesses that he loves Violet, he tells her “I care more about your feelings than my own.”
While I don’t think anyone would doubt Tate loved Violet, he still had some serious personal issues to work out—specifically, mommy issues—that were just too much for Violet to cope with. For one, he raped Violet’s mother and got her pregnant with an anti-christ demon-baby, whom she died giving birth to. So there’s that. But other than these minor character flaws, Tate was perfect for Violet. They understood each other in a world they each otherwise felt very misunderstood and alone in. In the end, Violet tells him she loves him, but can’t be with him because he needs to pay for all the pain he’s caused. If only Tate wasn’t a psychopath murdering-rapist, these two would have been soulmates. Oh well, I suppose they will have a lot of time on their hands living out the rest of eternity as ghosts in the same haunted house, perhaps there is a chance Violet may eventually forgive him, and they can be together in their dark paradise once more.
4. Ragnar and Lagertha, Vikings
Quite possibly the most badass couple in the history of television, the famous warrior Ragnar and the feisty shield-maiden Lagertha seemed to have it all—a farm, children, a priest-slave—not to mention chemistry and passion through the roof—but unfortunately, couples who raid together don’t always stay together. Tragedy struck the King and Queen of Kattegat soon after Lagertha miscarried, when Ragnar totally blew it and cheated on Lagertha with a stupid, boring princess, and then got said stupid, boring princess pregnant. Lagertha was going to take Ragnar back (after first slapping him around a bit) but the fact that he got Princess Aslaug pregnant was the final straw. When Lagertha makes her decision to leave Kattegat, we see Ragnar truly torn up, telling her he does not want her to go, but she replies “it’s fate.”
While I understand Ragnar just wanted some sons to live out his legacy and Lagertha was sadly unfit to provide him with those sons, I just can’t forgive him for ruining such a dynamic relationship and tearing his family apart. Even though Ragnar married Princess Aslaug and she gave him several sons, it was obvious there was no love or passion in their marriage. Years later when Ragnar and Lagertha meet back up to become allies, we see that their feelings for one another have not subsided. Ragnar’s heart always lied with Lagertha, and although she was too headstrong to ever take him back, we hear her later admit at Ragnar’s casket that she has never stopped loving him either, as she says “Don’t forget about me. Haunt me. Never leave me.” Ugh, cue the waterworks.
3. Ian and Mickey, Shameless
What is there to say about this couple that I haven’t already?
To quote Rhianna, Mickey and Ian found love in a hopeless place. Though in the beginning Mickey struggled with accepting his sexuality, when he realized he loved Ian and nothing anyone could say would change that– not even his violent, homophobe father– Mickey, as damaged of a character as he was, was able to find acceptance in himself through that love for Ian. Despite this breakthrough, this couple hit many other ups and downs along their relationship– Ian’s mental illness being a particularly hard bump to get over. Though Ian seemed to loved reaping the benefits of the chase, once his bi-polar disorder kicked in he seemed to be under the delusion Mickey didn’t care for him any longer. This is when their relationship began to crumble.
It was hard to watch Mickey do everything in his power to give Ian unconditional love and care during the rough points of Ian’s illness, just to watch Ian push him further and further away. Even though Mickey would always be ride or die for him, Ian had some shit he needed to work out first. Though in the most recent season we got a sliver of hope that the two might get their happily-ever-after, it turned out the writers were only playing with the strung-out emotions of us Gallavich fans, as the couple was separated once more, for what feels like the final time. *screams into pillow.*
2. Carol and Daryl, The Walking Dead
Okay, I know what you’re thinking. “They’re just friends!” “Carol is too old for Daryl!” “It’s more of a mother/son relationship!” I feel like I may be off in my own little row boat shipping this one, but I would proudly go down with this ship any day. The slow-burn relationship between these two is so slow it’s maddening, but even without the outright displays of affection, Carol and Daryl are true soulmates in every sense of the word. They are both damaged souls who have hurt in similar ways and know each other’s scars. Underneath their extremely deep, loyal friendship, It’s always been obvious how much they love each other; Daryl would do anything to make sure Carol was safe, and Carol’s trust and faith in Daryl is unwavering.
When Carol and Daryl, otherwise known as “Caryl” first came about, Carol was grieving over her missing daughter, and Daryl found purpose in searching her. Carol not only taught Daryl he had something to offer the group and was “every bit as good” as the group leaders Rick and Shane, but she was the first person Daryl, as the outcast, stray of the group, found a connection to and showed the first signs of vulnerability to. We’ve seen Daryl lose his mind over and over again, afraid that he’s lost Carol for good—but every time we’ve been tortured by a Carol/Daryl separation, they’ve reunited in the most epic, heart-imploding ways that speak volumes to how deep their quiet, unspoken love for each other is. I think the Terminus reunion might take the cake for not only my favorite Caryl moment, but just maybe my favorite Walking Dead moment, ever. I mean, LOOK AT THEM. Hopefully they will have their Rick/Michonne moment soon.
1. Ron and Hermione, Harry Potter
Alright, coming in at number one, my OTP (One True Pair) is by far my longest lasting ship, that I’ve been shipping long before I even knew what a “ship” was. This relationship was renounced by J.K. Rowling herself, and since being totally crushed by that news, I am now here to say why I disagree and think this is actually a perfect pairing. Ron and Hermione are a true yin-and-yang coupling. Hermione needs Ron to keep her relaxed and not so high-strung, while Hermione inspires Ron to always be more. I’m sorry, but Hermione is not the girl to be swooned by the “The Chosen One” (sorry, Harry). Like she said herself, she always found Ron “interesting,” and I think she was always impressed with his courage and heart.
The way Ron teased Hermione when they were young was just an example of a young, dumb boy picking on the girl he had a crush on because he didn’t know how to handle his feelings. Even still, throughout the entire series they always bickered and nagged each other like an old married couple, which was always telling. Ron’s jealousy was sometimes less than charming, particularly when Hermione went to the Yule Ball with Quidditch legend Viktor Krum. But either way, Ron was always quick to valiantly defend Hermione, whether he was saving her from a mountain troll, sticking up for her when Malfoy called her a “filthy mudblood” or running head-first at a falling chandelier just to save her from the psychotic Bellatrix Lestrange.
It’s also easy to forget how much time Ron and Hermione spent together when Harry was busy, like all those times Hermione stayed at the burrow over the summers with Ron, or the countless times they spent sitting in the stands together watching Harry’s Quidditch matches. When you think about it this way, it’s easy to imagine how these two to fell in love. Even though this couple was clearly MFEO (Made for Each Other) and we know in the end they got their happily-ever-after, so to speak, that doesn’t comfort the despair felt by ‘Romione’ shippers who still grieve over the fact that Ron and Hermione never once went on a proper date throughout all seven books. Oh, bleeding hearts of the world unite!
Did any of your ships make my list? If not, what couples out there have traumatized you the most?